What do you guys feel about.. Why can't we talk or see girls?

Dyammn, don't get married, unless marriage is for GC or Tax purposes or something like that and it benefits you right away. someone told this , i like this idea:
Before marriage , you're a man. After marriage you become an animal cuz you have four feet now.. and after sometime you will have childrens and you become spider and then you get trapped on your own web.....
so don't get married but have fun.. there are lots of women who want to have fun and no string attached....
good luck..

DP:

Thoughtful article indeed and very well written! It's not the commitment but the co-dependency, unrealistic demands and the possessiveness that spook me. Trust and respect are two ingredients that make a relationship work, regardless of the marriage contract.

Keep writing! Maybe I'll come to you for "a match made in heaven"! ;)

Sitara Jee:
For some unknown reasons, I always thought you were married.Thanks for the comments on the article.
It shouldn't be hard to find out whether someone is possessive.You will notice it without any difficulty in everyday circumstances.(This is before you commit)
You both should work hard to fulfill each other's realistic demands.You should be bold enough to say No to unrealistic ones.Or explain why they are being unrealistic.So, it shouldn't be a problem.At least, for people of our level.
Co-dependency (in broad meaning) is both good and bad in a relationship.It shouldn't be in extremes though.We are capable enough to balance it.A problem occurs only if "Co-dependency" changes to "dependency".
If I can be of any help in locating your "match made in heaven", you know where to find me..:)
DP.

DP, right here..."ME" ...you want my profile too ??? i would be a perfect match for her..

Confused honey yes..."YOU"... Sweety, I know you are confused but let's not get delusional shall we?! :))))

i must be dreaming...am i DREAMING???, I must be the luckiest guy in this world, oohhh dude, am like another dannah now...dammn dude, everything feels so pretty now,..ooohhh god!!!,such an amazing feeling....

so sitara, can we set the date, time and location ?? i am just getting too excited noww..ooh dude...omg..omg..

hey DP, your article is superb! I really liked how u presented the views from both sides..... commitment is never the less hard but if u find a right person u want to have another lifetime with that person..... I think in nepali society...u know how we can't date people or marry people of our choices.....this system makes us scared about commitment.....ahhh..spending the rest of our lives with some stranger? I wonder could we even comprehend what love is all about? If we haven't dated many people then when we get attracted to somebody else it's just because of infatuation....(there's no getting to know that person better phase) , it's like an indian movie...romantic, silly, fun, exciting but not the seriousness. And people get serious only after they get married...which is too late! Hopefully people will be able to date and actually find the right match and be happy. But for now, people shouldn't give up......keep looking.......The important thing is the importance to find the perfect match not the age dilemma we have to go through! GOOD JOB DP!

Confused bro:
I am glad that you broke up with Moneyminded.Man, you are the lucky SOB (sorry for the word).See, it is already working.....

Sitara:
All I could do was to laugh and laugh again.

SP:
Thanks for the comments.I believe, even in arranged marriage, you know each other and start loving each other.So, you won't remain strangers for long.

I just noticed that the later part of this discussion has been only among SP, Confused, Sitara, and myself.

DP.

Somebody, quick call the Vet! Please put this poor confused, delusional, fever-ravaged creaturel out of his misery!!!!


Alas, the fainthearted weakling that I am... can't commit mercy killing! :(

Sitara - Sent you an email via Sajha.com on your article. Could you check your email address with which you signed on Sajha? Appreciate it.

My Sajha address does work!

I received 2 emails from the same person, is that you? AU :)

If not,
Please re-send it! Appreciate it.

Email, just post your email add! :-D

ok here's another one:
himalisitara@yahoo.com


Thanks redstone! :)

sitara, smart! :p

DP, your article sounds more like an advertisement of your matchmaking website business.

I believe that if one is not ready for marriage for whatever reason he/she believe sin, then he/she shouldn't marry. There shouldn't be any rush in marrying.
And I do believe that there are people who postpone their plan for marriages because they believe that it might conflict with their "just now picking up" career, or even their studies. Marriage brings responsibilities, it makes you think twice before deciding for anything, be it realted to career, studies or projected goal. There are people who get married looking for a greater freedom, or due to pressure from family/relatives, or after listening to talks like of DP's suggesting benefits from marriage, or whatever you may want to call, while not being mentally ready. And the consequence of it, well the spouse suffers, and to make it worst, the kid. I have known people here who got married in Nepal, and then quickly realized that they were not yet done attaining their projected goal, and came to US to study or work while their wives or kids couldn't come. It might be fine for the husband because he is here to make his career, but for his wife and kid, it is hell living without a husband and a father. Then there are those who are not prepared mentally, and are not done exploring their bachelorhood, that they get married, and get soon tired of the spouse, and start cheating.
It may not be hard to cheat on your spouse, what is hard, is not to. And that's when you have make efforts. If you think you are not ready yet mentally, I suggest do not get married, at least for the sake of whomever you are getting married to.

Hurray:
It is not an ad....there is no mention of the website's name (Sorry, forgot that you were not a marketing major).
It is not a business....no monetary transactions involved at all (Sorry, you forgot to read the word FREE)
I acknowledge your views about getting married without perparation. Well, I have written about the need of "a good preparation" before getting married (Sorry you seem to have missed a whole paragraph here).
That was a small article with some of my limited views on a very vast issue.I don't expect it to be anywhere near complete.In addition, as Chinua Achebe wrote, MARRIAGE IS A PRIVATE AFFAIR.Thank you for the comments though.

Personal note to Hurray:
Glad to know that you got your H1B done.I had seen your thread a few days ago on getting H1B visa stamped.So, that "Virginia thing" worked, right?

DP.

Nope, the Virginia or NJ thing did not work. However, thanks for offering the help.


Anyway, if you want to play with words then, I never mentioned that you were posting an ad campaign of your web-site. All I said was "[It] sounds like."

No I am not a marketing major and I don't think you are either. You can still have ad-campaign for your web-site whether it is free or not.

And yeah, you do not have to be a sorry ass. Sorry this, sorry that....
You just sound like you have so much guilt hidden inside you.

That "sorry" stuff was just a dry sarcasm.Wow ! should I thank you for calling me "a sorry ass"?
Sorry (being a sorry ass once again) to hear that getting H1B done from Indian headhunters from VA or NJ didn't workout.Sailesh Adhikari had called me 2 months ago on your behalf for that information.Getting H1B was the immediate goal, and you got it.That is what counts.Good luck.
DP.

ha ha .. what an answer Hurray... bro

I never understood the theme of the article anyway, but i thought it might be because I am dumb. Most intellegnet people here have already praised the article so i though it might be my dumbness again and i kept my mouth shut.. but isn't it little intersting that you are basing your opinion upon your successful marriage. What about those people for whome the marriage won't work?
On one of the threads i think you even said that those of us who do not get married are losers.. is that right? I don't think so. We're having the fun which we think is fun, and you're having the fun - which you think is fun. I can't imagine myself getting married , driving my old car, with my wife and three childrens whining in the back..
So the marriage might be good for you and all those who want to get married. However, there are people who do not want to get married and love to be single and have fun.
Personally, I love being single because i love the freedom associated with it. tommorrow morning I can make plans to go to Singapore and stay there for a month, I can break up with my girlfriend and move on and meet someone else, I can buy whatever I want without asking another person about it, I can not worry about my children or thier school.. jeeze there are 10000 reason not to get married...
If you are old and you think you're running out of the eggs or losing your power to make a girl pregnenet ;) then it is understandable why you would like to get married. But if you're single, is capable to find mates and enjoying your free life- don't get married....

Please read this :

http://www.perkel.com/pbl/married/

Don't get married then....easy as that.
DP.